Mom's Coming to My House Lyrics

She raised me from a little boy,
oh so long ago
And I try to do whatever she says,
because she knows
And even though I don't live with her,
I moved out on my own
When I get the word that she's on the way
I clean up my home
Mom's coming to my house
I gotta clean up my room
Mom's coming to my house
So I'd better go buy a broom
Wash the floor wash the door
Wash the dishes then wash some more
My mom's coming to my house
Better hide the p**********

Mom's coming to my house
We gotta clean up this mess
Mom's coming to my house
So I'd better take off the dress
Before she arrives, gotta clean up this dive
Put away the bong and hide the hot knives
She won't know what they're for..
but someone might tell her from work
Put away that severed head
My mom is on the way
Get that naked man out of my bed
or she'll find out I am gay
Before she gets here better hide the beer
Put away the whips and the bondage gear
My mom's coming to my house
Send the naked biker home
[flute solo]

In my medicine chest there's a VD test
Throw it way or she won't be impressed
Get the hookers to leave
Give the guns to Steve
Hide the bomb making recipes
Find the Windex, Find the Comet
Find me something that'll cut through vomit
Hide the drugs and the b*** plugs
Cover the pentagram up with the rug

My mom's coming to my house
She'll be staying till about.. 4:30