The British police are the best in the world
I don't believe one of these stories I've heard
About pretty policemen in leather and jeans
Showing their leg through a split in their seams
Learing at people, leading them on
Then running them in when they start to respond
The press all ignore it, they don't wanna see
Except when the case is ... a Tory MP
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way, hey
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way
Pictures of naked young women are best
In the News of the Screws and the popular press
They plaster their pages with bingo and t***
Then add all the scandal and slander that fits
The women of Greenham they smeared and despised
They crucify Elton with snearing and lies
If it's paedophile teachers and l****** nuns
If it's filthy and fiction, it's ... all there in the Sun
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way, hey
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way
Now there's a cancer to blame on the gays
It's brutal and fatal and slowly enpains
The moral majority like it a lot
'Cause it's 'the wages of sin' and 'the judgement of God'
The medics are baffled and caught on the run
They say it's a nightmare that's barely begun
When government's spending is barely a joke
'Cause saving gay lives doesn't ... win any votes
So try and sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way, hey
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way
And sit back and watch as they seize all our books
And treat us like lepers and sinners and crooks
Just hope you don't get caught up in the raids
Or pick up a 'pink' or a partner with AIDS
Lie to your workmates and lie to your folks
Put down the clones and tell l****** jokes
Forget the impression from everywhere else
While we still do a wonderful job ... at pressing ourselves
So try and sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way, hey
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way, hey
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy ... this way
I don't believe one of these stories I've heard
About pretty policemen in leather and jeans
Showing their leg through a split in their seams
Learing at people, leading them on
Then running them in when they start to respond
The press all ignore it, they don't wanna see
Except when the case is ... a Tory MP
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way, hey
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way
Pictures of naked young women are best
In the News of the Screws and the popular press
They plaster their pages with bingo and t***
Then add all the scandal and slander that fits
The women of Greenham they smeared and despised
They crucify Elton with snearing and lies
If it's paedophile teachers and l****** nuns
If it's filthy and fiction, it's ... all there in the Sun
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way, hey
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way
Now there's a cancer to blame on the gays
It's brutal and fatal and slowly enpains
The moral majority like it a lot
'Cause it's 'the wages of sin' and 'the judgement of God'
The medics are baffled and caught on the run
They say it's a nightmare that's barely begun
When government's spending is barely a joke
'Cause saving gay lives doesn't ... win any votes
So try and sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way, hey
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way
And sit back and watch as they seize all our books
And treat us like lepers and sinners and crooks
Just hope you don't get caught up in the raids
Or pick up a 'pink' or a partner with AIDS
Lie to your workmates and lie to your folks
Put down the clones and tell l****** jokes
Forget the impression from everywhere else
While we still do a wonderful job ... at pressing ourselves
So try and sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way, hey
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy that way, hey
Sing if you're glad to be gay
Sing if you're happy ... this way