if, when all i have left to do, is to force myself to hate you to get over you... if, when all i have left, is to become callous to every feeling i have about you to get over you... then i don't want to live, because i can never hate you. no matter how bad you hurt me, i will never hate you. but, if i live, then so does my love for you. and that creates a sadness that makes my heart and my life unlivable. i don't want to become cold again, just so i can get over you. i did that before and i nearly lost myself. i nearly lost myself. if, when everything falls away and all i have left is to force myself to hate you to get over you, even then i still won't, though living like this is unbearable. then i guess i can't live anymore, because i could never hate you. i will never hate you. i'll always love you.