(Robbie Williams) The word's on the street: you've found someone new
(Liam Gallagher)If he looks nothing like me I'm so happy for you
(Kylie Minogue)I heard an old girlfriend has turned to the church
(David Bowie) she's trying to replace me, but it'll never work
(Kylie Minogue & David Bowie) 'Cos every touch reminds you of just how sweet it could have been
(George Michael) And every time he kisses you it leaves behind the bitter taste of saccharine
(Bono) A bad cover version of love is not the real thing
(Paul McCartney) Bikini-clad girl on the front who invited you in
(Craig David) Such great disappointment when you got him home
(Kylie Minogue) the original was so good
(Tom Jones) the one you no longer own, and every touch reminds you of
(Bjork) just how sweet it could have been
(Brett Anderson) And every time he kisses you
(Kurt Cobain) you get the taste of saccharine
(Rod Stewart) It's not easy to forget me
(Meatloaf) it's so hard to disconnect
(Cher) When it's electronically reprocessed to give a more life-like effect
(Jason Kay) Aah, sing your song
(Jarvis c***er) about all the sad imitations
(Mick Jagger) that got it so wrong
(everybody) It's like a later Tom & Jerry when the two of them could talk
Like the Stones since the Eighties, like the last days of Southfork.
Like Planet of the Apes on TV, the second side of 'Til the Band Comes in
Like an own-brand box of cornflakes: he's going to let you down my friend.
(Liam Gallagher)If he looks nothing like me I'm so happy for you
(Kylie Minogue)I heard an old girlfriend has turned to the church
(David Bowie) she's trying to replace me, but it'll never work
(Kylie Minogue & David Bowie) 'Cos every touch reminds you of just how sweet it could have been
(George Michael) And every time he kisses you it leaves behind the bitter taste of saccharine
(Bono) A bad cover version of love is not the real thing
(Paul McCartney) Bikini-clad girl on the front who invited you in
(Craig David) Such great disappointment when you got him home
(Kylie Minogue) the original was so good
(Tom Jones) the one you no longer own, and every touch reminds you of
(Bjork) just how sweet it could have been
(Brett Anderson) And every time he kisses you
(Kurt Cobain) you get the taste of saccharine
(Rod Stewart) It's not easy to forget me
(Meatloaf) it's so hard to disconnect
(Cher) When it's electronically reprocessed to give a more life-like effect
(Jason Kay) Aah, sing your song
(Jarvis c***er) about all the sad imitations
(Mick Jagger) that got it so wrong
(everybody) It's like a later Tom & Jerry when the two of them could talk
Like the Stones since the Eighties, like the last days of Southfork.
Like Planet of the Apes on TV, the second side of 'Til the Band Comes in
Like an own-brand box of cornflakes: he's going to let you down my friend.