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Ben Lyrics

"BEN: You lucky, lucky b******.
BRIAN: What?
BEN: Proper little jailer's pet, aren't we?
BRIAN: What do you mean?
BEN: You must have slipped him a few shekels, eh?
BRIAN: Slipped him a few shekels? You saw him spit in my face!
BEN: Ohh! What wouldn't I give to be spat at in the face! I sometimes hang
awake at night dreaming of being spat at in the face.
BRIAN: Well, it's not exactly friendly, is it? They had me in manacles!
BEN: Manacles! Ooh oooh oh oh. My idea of heaven is to be allowed to be
put in manacles... just for a few hours. They must think the sun shines out o' your a***, sonny.
BRIAN: Oh, lay off me. I've had a hard time!
BEN: You've had a hard time?! I've been here five years! They only hung me
the right way up yesterday! So, don't you come 'rou--
BRIAN: All right. All right.
BEN: They must think you're Lord God Almighty.
BRIAN: What will they do to me?
BEN: Oh, you'll probably get away with crucifixion.
BRIAN: Crucifixion?!
BEN: Yeah, first offence.
BRIAN: Get away with crucifixion?! It's--
BEN: Best thing the Romans ever did for us.
BRIAN: What?!
BEN: Oh, yeah. If we didn't have crucifixion, this country would be in a
right b***** mess.
BRIAN: Guards!
BEN: Nail him up, I say!"
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Monty Python's Life of Brian (2006)
Introduction Brian Song The Wise Men at the Manger Brian Song, Part 2 Sermon on the Mount (Big Nose) Stone Salesman Stoning Ex-Leper You Mean You Were Raped? (Nortius Maximus) Link to Revolutionaries in the Amphitheatre (Loretta) Revolutionaries in the Amphitheatre (Loretta) Romans Go Home What Have the Romans Ever Done for Us? Ben Brian Before Pilate (Throw Him to the Floor) Prophets Beard Salesman Brian's Prophecy The Hermit He's Not the Messiah He's a Very Naughty Boy Pilate Sentences Brian Nisus Wettus Pilate With the Crowd (Welease Wodger) Nisus Wettus With the Gaolers Release Brian Not So Bad Once You're Up Revs Salute Brian Cheeky Is Released Mandy to Her Son Look on the Bright Side of Life (All Things Dull and Ugly)