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Budding Ornithologists Are Weary of Tired a***ogies Lyrics

[Hook]
I refuse to learn gimmicky dance moves
But surely this is something you can shake your a** to
All the clever rhymes have been written
So divas settle for Kevin Feder-lines
[Verse]
I let my mind wander far beyond Mars
Which normally means whatever channel is playing p*** Stars
Sometimes I wonder why I wasn't picked to be Green Lantern
Or why I'm forced to spit these rhymes in dimly lit taverns

These songs aren't worth the paper that they're written on
Tattoos are expensive and I've got sensitive palms
I'm Walt White without pants, pistol drawn
My life consists of veggie bacon and getting p***** upon

There are crackhead cro-magnons who have to de-thaw
And show their club memberships with Starbucks beverage green straws
I never played football, I was team fumbler
Hip-hop is cool if you quote me on your Tumblr
Over an auspicious backdrop of nebulas
My music career has a slight upward slope of hyperbola
My other job's only line is, "tonight, I'll be servin' ya!"
Hip-hop is so trivial
But we argue about who can do it better
Like we're not all rearranging the same 26 letters
We write songs that have the power of a b**per sticker
I don't pay at the pump, I go inside to bicker

About how my c**ture's been overrun by live wiggers'
Ode's to black men and the women they t**le "gold diggers"
I grew up slathering myself in vaseline
Rappers must have achy necks and need to cop some Aspercreme
Change my relationship to "It's Complicating"
Which opens up my evening to chat messages and masturbating
Rap fans discuss how many times Dre detoxes
I'm in the corner with my headphones and Fleet Foxes
Wishing we were building soundscapes from beatboxes

[Hook]
I refuse to learn gimmicky dance moves
But surely this is something you can shake your a** to

[Hook] x2
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