[Intro: MC Paul Barman and samples]
Who cooks for you? Who cooks for you?
(Does anyone know the answer to that question?)
(I don't know.)
(I don't know.)
(She looks me direct in the eye
And replies)
Who cooks for you all?
[Verse 1: MC Paul Barman]
Customers shop, discussioners stop
A rich man steps to the clerk, busting her chops
"I make more green than algae
Loop-de-loops with ice cream scoops now are just nostalgie" (Oh really?)
"Because I got coops of well-fed pheasants
I made my web presence on the backs of dead peasants
I got all types of cash
And I'll talk trash like a hyperspazz
'til my mouth catches diaper rash"
She said, "Can a man remain posh
Without being brainwashed?
Is it really all web sites, tennis whites, and playing squash?
What a jerk, was he trying to flirt?"
As the clerk got back to work, another guy went berserk
A crazy guy with a paisley tie
And one glass and one lazy eye came in
His brain was spongy Grade D lunch meat
Held together with a scrunchy
Wait til' you find out what he said
"If y'all are so destitute
How come you're dressed so cute?
Sometimes it's best to toot
My own horn
About my idiosyncrasies
I video pink p******
I shoot my own p***
Cause it's wrong to rape a s***
It's wrong to penetrate the paper cut
Where an origami truck scraped her b***
I'm pacing and passionate
Cause my cupcake had hash in it
Look, a dopey fairy
Is chasing a doggy topiary
I'm'a help her with catching it!
I'm outta here"
The clerk, she just rolled her eyes
You could say he told her lies
But she'll let any old tramp in
Nothing sold is no surprise
And they're lampin' (Chilling indeed)
At the Anarchist Bookstore
[Hook: MC Paul Barman]
Who cooks for you? Who cooks for you?
Who cooks for you all?
[Verse 2: MC Paul Barman]
As the clerk worked on a blurb about herb
Another berserker jumped in off the curb
Wearing a metal mask
"May I help you?" she, unsettled, asked
"Outside there's an army of Metal Faces
And in several cases
They're ready to dead all shtetl places
This is it
Adults'll need protection."
She said, "Yeah, but what changes when you're done?
Nothing. Like the results of an election."
He said, "Oh, so I should just call it off?
Go back to the house, douse the Molotov?"
"Listen, You want to see our city in flames
Cause you're full of pity and blame
You just want the freedom to sit at home and play videogames
Maybe we could drain some ingrained aggression
If you came for a training session"
He said, "I don't want to volunteer
I'm calling y'all in here
To flash some sack
And smash the Mac
And get outside, it's action-packed
I don't know if you are, but all of you look poor
Now let's leave (I ain't goin' in there) the Anarchist Bookstore
[Outro]
Who cooks for you? Who cooks for you?
(Does anyone know the moral of that story?)
Who cooks for you all?
(Story)
(Yeah...yeah...does kind of look like he's been suckin' on the loco weed)
(Hey, like, far out, like)
(Ahahahaha)
(Ah wanna try some LSD mixed with cyanide and a ---)
(Hey, hey, man I told you)
(No, noo, nooo!)
(Tripped a lot out here in the woods lately)
(I never did like him anyhow)
(You won't get away with this, cracker)
(She looks me direct in the eye
And replies)
(I can feel it! I can feel it!)
(Ahahahaha)
Who cooks for you? Who cooks for you?
(Does anyone know the answer to that question?)
(I don't know.)
(I don't know.)
(She looks me direct in the eye
And replies)
Who cooks for you all?
[Verse 1: MC Paul Barman]
Customers shop, discussioners stop
A rich man steps to the clerk, busting her chops
"I make more green than algae
Loop-de-loops with ice cream scoops now are just nostalgie" (Oh really?)
"Because I got coops of well-fed pheasants
I made my web presence on the backs of dead peasants
I got all types of cash
And I'll talk trash like a hyperspazz
'til my mouth catches diaper rash"
She said, "Can a man remain posh
Without being brainwashed?
Is it really all web sites, tennis whites, and playing squash?
What a jerk, was he trying to flirt?"
As the clerk got back to work, another guy went berserk
A crazy guy with a paisley tie
And one glass and one lazy eye came in
His brain was spongy Grade D lunch meat
Held together with a scrunchy
Wait til' you find out what he said
"If y'all are so destitute
How come you're dressed so cute?
Sometimes it's best to toot
My own horn
About my idiosyncrasies
I video pink p******
I shoot my own p***
Cause it's wrong to rape a s***
It's wrong to penetrate the paper cut
Where an origami truck scraped her b***
I'm pacing and passionate
Cause my cupcake had hash in it
Look, a dopey fairy
Is chasing a doggy topiary
I'm'a help her with catching it!
I'm outta here"
The clerk, she just rolled her eyes
You could say he told her lies
But she'll let any old tramp in
Nothing sold is no surprise
And they're lampin' (Chilling indeed)
At the Anarchist Bookstore
[Hook: MC Paul Barman]
Who cooks for you? Who cooks for you?
Who cooks for you all?
[Verse 2: MC Paul Barman]
As the clerk worked on a blurb about herb
Another berserker jumped in off the curb
Wearing a metal mask
"May I help you?" she, unsettled, asked
"Outside there's an army of Metal Faces
And in several cases
They're ready to dead all shtetl places
This is it
Adults'll need protection."
She said, "Yeah, but what changes when you're done?
Nothing. Like the results of an election."
He said, "Oh, so I should just call it off?
Go back to the house, douse the Molotov?"
"Listen, You want to see our city in flames
Cause you're full of pity and blame
You just want the freedom to sit at home and play videogames
Maybe we could drain some ingrained aggression
If you came for a training session"
He said, "I don't want to volunteer
I'm calling y'all in here
To flash some sack
And smash the Mac
And get outside, it's action-packed
I don't know if you are, but all of you look poor
Now let's leave (I ain't goin' in there) the Anarchist Bookstore
[Outro]
Who cooks for you? Who cooks for you?
(Does anyone know the moral of that story?)
Who cooks for you all?
(Story)
(Yeah...yeah...does kind of look like he's been suckin' on the loco weed)
(Hey, like, far out, like)
(Ahahahaha)
(Ah wanna try some LSD mixed with cyanide and a ---)
(Hey, hey, man I told you)
(No, noo, nooo!)
(Tripped a lot out here in the woods lately)
(I never did like him anyhow)
(You won't get away with this, cracker)
(She looks me direct in the eye
And replies)
(I can feel it! I can feel it!)
(Ahahahaha)