No matter how much I do, there is an overwhelming sense that I'm not doing enough; In every facet of my life. A heavy psychological burden to be carrying; Like a backpack full of fifty five pound plates. But it brings with it a clear message: never accept mediocrity. A hunger that can never be fed; True satisfaction never felt. Couple this with a deep rooted, unspecified anger that has existed and remained constant for the greater part of my post-p***scent life, save for a few short periods of general contentment. And we're starting to paint a seemingly dreary picture. But fret not my dear, for within this state I am driven. Within this state I cannot fail. Within this state I will attack the challenges I've laid before myself without reserve and with unbridled passion. Within this state I find life. This is the ugliest happy you've ever seen.