Smoothie: A True Story Lyrics

Late one night a call of fright

Rang from the South of Chicago
A man was beat, the cuts were deep

It could not wait 'til tomorrow

When we arrived the captain sighed

"Well fellows, it looks like he took some lead"

His face was smashed, a great big gash

Half way across his head

He said to a brother as I looked him over

"d***, she hit me once mo'!"

"With what ?" I asked with a curious gasp

The phone, the chair, the do'? No...

Smoothie - Smoothie, she hit me with the smoothie
She hit me with the smoothie again

Smoothie - Smoothie, she hit me with the smoothie

The b**** done hit me with the smoothie again

It made no sense, but in my defense

I'm not up on all that slang

So I went to the truck, but I had no luck

With the word so absurd as it rang

The crews face showed that they didn't know
What the hell he was saying

I started to laugh, but I had to go back

To where that guy was laying

As I stopped the flood of brain and blood

Flowing from out of his head

I asked him again, as I swallowed my grin

And this is what he said...

Excuse me, um, sir, I guess I'm no whiz

But I just don't know what a smoothie is

He didn't even wince as he swigged his fifth

"You know, the thing you smooth the clothes out with!"