Stay Up, Stay Alive Lyrics

soo hard to look myself in the eye, peer soo deeply to whats hiding inside
true evil that i never thought, to hurt after all those times i've been hurt
and now i'm retracing all my steps, drawing back all my breaths until my death
my brother and me, my mother and me...all those childhood memories
why the f*** can't i find my way
forgive all these sins i can't afford to pay
its been too long since i've lost my way
forced to sit back and watch my life decay

the pain is too real,
soo many scars i can't help but feel
helpless feeling falls over me
like being stabbed and stabbed repeatedly
sob story plays out before my eyes
regret that makes me feel less than alive
empty hole in my heart where my lies could hide
painted image of the world that i'm locked inside

until my last my goal is to stay alive
survival of the fit only the strong survive
so i'll swing and swing until i spit my last
forever i walk down this dead end path
forever i walk alone

forever i walk alone, my mind is an ocean and i'll sink like a stone
i can't bear this cross these thorns as i follow the reaper down this path alone