Don't smoke don't fight don't light no cigarettes
Or else you'll wind up in the can
No jokes no rights sit tight don't fool around
You are a guest of Uncle Sam
Stand up look right don't slouch and stand at ease
Allow no s** above the knees
When I snap you jump into the master plan
I'll be d***ed
Well I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed if I drink or smoke
d***ed if I steal your joke
I'll be d***ed if I go for broke
d***ed if I do
d***ed if I don't
Don't talk don't fool don't try to mess around
I'll make a monkey outta you
You sign your name right on that dotted line boy
I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed if I drink or smoke
d***ed if I steal your joke
I'll be d***ed if I go for broke
d***ed if I do
And d***ed if I don't, yeah
Come on
I'll be d***ed if I drink or smoke
d***ed if I steal your joke
I'll be d***ed if I go for broke
I'm d***ed if I do
I'm d***ed if I don't
I'll be d***ed if I drink or smoke
d***ed if I steal your joke
I'll be d***ed if I go for broke
I'm d***ed if I do
I'm d***ed if I don't
I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed
Or else you'll wind up in the can
No jokes no rights sit tight don't fool around
You are a guest of Uncle Sam
Stand up look right don't slouch and stand at ease
Allow no s** above the knees
When I snap you jump into the master plan
I'll be d***ed
Well I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed if I drink or smoke
d***ed if I steal your joke
I'll be d***ed if I go for broke
d***ed if I do
d***ed if I don't
Don't talk don't fool don't try to mess around
I'll make a monkey outta you
You sign your name right on that dotted line boy
I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed if I drink or smoke
d***ed if I steal your joke
I'll be d***ed if I go for broke
d***ed if I do
And d***ed if I don't, yeah
Come on
I'll be d***ed if I drink or smoke
d***ed if I steal your joke
I'll be d***ed if I go for broke
I'm d***ed if I do
I'm d***ed if I don't
I'll be d***ed if I drink or smoke
d***ed if I steal your joke
I'll be d***ed if I go for broke
I'm d***ed if I do
I'm d***ed if I don't
I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed
I'll be d***ed