Insecurity this time it's got the best of me. Apathy this time I think it's killing me. Try to scream but I can't make any noise. Try to breathe but the breath has lost my voice. There has got to be a better way. Some way to get rid of this f****** pain. Is my future in a razor blade? Sometimes suicide isn't so insane. Bad memories so I drink to forget. But you see all I lose is self respect. No control no more goals and no more aim. Blackened soul everyday it feels the same. Can't face the boredom that everyday brings. I'm feeling guilty for an uncommitted crime. Left dangling from a puppeteer's strings. My body's free but my mind is doing time. Suicide everyday a soul is lost. Justified I think I'll carry my own cross. Bedside note sory mother if you cry. But life's a joke so I think today, I'll just lay down and die.