Listen up brothers and sisters, come hear my desperate tale
I speak of our friends of nature, trapped in the dirt like a jail
Vegtables live in oppression, served on our tables each night
This killing of veggies is madness, I say we take up the fight
Salads are only for murderers, cole slaw's a fascist regime
Don't think that they don't have feelings, just cause a radish can't scream
Chorus:
I've heard the screams of the vegetables(Scream... scream... scream)
Watching their skins being peeled (Having their insides revealed)
Grated and steamed with no mercy..(Burning off calories)
How do you think that feels? (That it hurts really bad)
Carrot juice constitutes murder..(And that's a real crime)
greenhouses prisons for slaves (Let my vegetables go!)
It's time to stop all this gardening..(It's dirty as hell)
Let's call a spade a spade. (is a spade is a spade is a)
I saw a man eating celery, so I beat him black and blue
If he ever touches a sprout again, I'll b*** him clean in two
I'm a political prisoner, trapped in a windowless cage
'Cause I stopped the slaughter of turnips, by killing five men in a rage
I told the judge when he sentenced me, "This is my finest hour!
I'd kill those farmers again, just to save one more cauliflower!"
CHORUS
How low as people do we dare to stoop?
Making young broccolis bleed in the soup
Untie your beans! Uncage your tomatoes!
Let potted plants free! Don't mash that potato!! Whoa!... Whoa!... Whoa!...
I've heard the screams of the vegetables(Scream... scream... scream)
Watching their skins being peeled (Into the stirfryer sealed)
Grated and steamed with no mercy..(You fat gormet slob)
How do you think that feels? (Leave them out in the field)
Carrot juice constitutes murder..(V-8's genocide)
greenhouses prisons for slaves (yes, your composts are graves)
It's time to stop all this gardening..(Take Up macrame)
Let's call a spade a spade. (is a spade is a spade is a)
I speak of our friends of nature, trapped in the dirt like a jail
Vegtables live in oppression, served on our tables each night
This killing of veggies is madness, I say we take up the fight
Salads are only for murderers, cole slaw's a fascist regime
Don't think that they don't have feelings, just cause a radish can't scream
Chorus:
I've heard the screams of the vegetables(Scream... scream... scream)
Watching their skins being peeled (Having their insides revealed)
Grated and steamed with no mercy..(Burning off calories)
How do you think that feels? (That it hurts really bad)
Carrot juice constitutes murder..(And that's a real crime)
greenhouses prisons for slaves (Let my vegetables go!)
It's time to stop all this gardening..(It's dirty as hell)
Let's call a spade a spade. (is a spade is a spade is a)
I saw a man eating celery, so I beat him black and blue
If he ever touches a sprout again, I'll b*** him clean in two
I'm a political prisoner, trapped in a windowless cage
'Cause I stopped the slaughter of turnips, by killing five men in a rage
I told the judge when he sentenced me, "This is my finest hour!
I'd kill those farmers again, just to save one more cauliflower!"
CHORUS
How low as people do we dare to stoop?
Making young broccolis bleed in the soup
Untie your beans! Uncage your tomatoes!
Let potted plants free! Don't mash that potato!! Whoa!... Whoa!... Whoa!...
I've heard the screams of the vegetables(Scream... scream... scream)
Watching their skins being peeled (Into the stirfryer sealed)
Grated and steamed with no mercy..(You fat gormet slob)
How do you think that feels? (Leave them out in the field)
Carrot juice constitutes murder..(V-8's genocide)
greenhouses prisons for slaves (yes, your composts are graves)
It's time to stop all this gardening..(Take Up macrame)
Let's call a spade a spade. (is a spade is a spade is a)