If You Love Me (You'll Sleep on the Wet Spot) Lyrics

Darlin, you say you love me, but there so many things
you could do to prove that love to me.
You kiss me, and you hold me, bring me flowers all the time
But that's not enough to satisfy my needs
If you love me, you'll sleep on the wet spot.
You'd buy my tampons, with your food stamps.
You'd take out the garbage, clean out the cat box.
If you love me darlin, the wet spot is yours.

No you can't watch Jerry Springer, cause my dadgum wrastlin's on
Now keep that baby just as quiet as a mouse
And get your booty in that kitchen, and fry me up
some pork chops and eggs, like they do at Waffle House.
If you love me, you'll sleep on the wet spot.
You'd buy my tampons, with your food stamps.
You'd take out the garbage, clean out the cat box.
If you love me darlin, the wet spot is yours.

Quit your snorin, it's so borin,
and I'm freezin, cause you're teasin me
with just the corner of the covers,
I could smother your face,
with the pillow, billowin' the sheets
when you roll on the dog and he lets one, loose.
If you love me, you'll sleep on the wet spot.
You'd buy my tampons, with your food stamps.
You'd take out the garbage, clean out the cat box.
If you love me darlin, the wet spot is yours.
If you love me darlin, the wet spot is yours.

Or sleep on the floor